Nothing to Say?!?

“Most men will tell you stories straight through.  It won’t be complicated.  But it won’t be interesting either.”  From the movie “Big Fish”

Written feedback is not considered feedback to students from poverty backgrounds. They get their information verbally through relationship. They do not trust or value print. Homework as an assessment of how the student is doing is ineffective for students living in poverty. The chaos and crisis world of generational poverty leaves little room for academic endeavors. Recognize that motivation differs between social classes. Motivation to achieve in education is generally based on the assumption that there is a “value” of education. Most people living in poverty never have had a meaningful relationship with someone who has benefited from the educational system. My doctoral research on people growing up in generational poverty who now have Bachelor’s degrees showed that the meaning of education was “STRESS.” The stress of getting there, being on time, having the right clothes, lunch etc. Participants in my study were motivated to achieve only when education related to their values (e.g. “I want to help my family.”). The curriculum and activities should include entertainment. Entertainment is often used as a way to escape the harsh world of poverty. Spotlighting the kids most at risk as much as possible in positive ways can increase parental involvement and engagement with the school. Schools can use the expertise of families and students living in poverty to create opportunities for positive school experiences. from: Educating Students from Generational Poverty: Building Blocks from A to Z by Donna Beegle, Ed.D

Hanging out at church is fun.  We trade stories, we share in life, and we laugh -- a lot. And that is, in part, because of our background.  We deal in stories.  We rarely find that we have nothing to say.  We know how to play and how to build a story and when we talk we aren’t trying to “one up” each other we are trying to build a story.  We almost don’t understand folks that have “nothing to say” on a particular topic because we can always find an anchor for our stories.In part, that is our currency.  We know that it’s important to develop relationships -- relationships are how we survive this sometimes harsh, often chaotic world.  And stories and relationships go hand in hand.  In our corner of the world when someone looks at us and says, “tell me a story about that” we can usually oblige.  Using that same line in a meeting of mostly middle class folks will generate feelings of discomfort and sometimes even anger (because if we get caught up in telling stories then we might not make it through our agenda).  This week we had a meeting with another non-profit. They came from our neighborhood and so they are built on relationships and stories and vision and hope and sometimes despair.  Their founder had died and several of the remaining members were coming to the church because we had helped them with one of their events the year before.But this wasn’t a business meeting. It wasn’t anything more than a time set aside for us to sit together and tell stories -- about the person that we loved who was dead.  About our fear at crying in public. About the lives that we have seen changed through this program.  About the change that we see coming in ourselves and in our community.  At the end of the meeting we had accomplished “nothing”  (if we had been measuring by middle class standards).  But we knew one another better.  We were starting to use common language.  Trust, which was already possible, was more solid.At Parker Lane UMC our leaders meet twice a month.  Once a month just to pray -- nothing more and nothing less.  Our prayer time varies from month to month -- sometimes we are walking and praying, sometimes reading and praying, sometimes imagining and praying. But one meeting a month just to pray.  The second meeting each month is used for acting.  Acting on what we’ve heard in prayer.  Acting on what God might be calling us to do next.  We are often stunned when we learn that most churches don’t have a meeting each month just for the leaders to pray together. They are obviously doing something right because they get their business done. We just can’t imagine how we would be able to trust God without talking to God. And, since we are being asked by God to act as a body of Christ (something more than just a collection of individuals) we thing it’s important to do something more than just individual prayer.  Our meetings aren’t short.  We can’t tell a “story straight through” to save our lives.  Our stories often twist and turn before finding their conclusion. They are a way for us to make ourselves vulnerable and to stretch our understanding.  They are a way for us to learn more about one another and to look to the future together.  We don’t think that it’s a coincidence that Jesus used story-telling as his primary teaching tool.  If you want to learn more about how our stories shape our lives you can read more  at www.parkerlane.org.  If you’d like to support the work of the church you can donate on line at that same website.